'Your dragon tattoo cannot save you now'

All predictions seem to have The Artist's Jean Dujardin winning Best Actor at the Oscars Sunday night. And that wouldn't bother me too much, since I enjoyed that movie. Even though George Clooney should win for The Descendants.

It'll be interesting to see how Dujardin cashes in. Hopefully, it goes something like this.

Jean Dujardin's Villain Auditions from Jean Dujardin

I would go see "Larry Crowne 2" if Dujardin drowned Tom Hanks at the end. Especially if the sequel kept the Jeff Lynne and Tom Petty music, which is the one thing I enjoyed about Larry Crowne. 

Normally, I would do an Oscars predictions post, but there doesn't seem to be much suspense for this year's awards. Almost all of the categories seem to have heavy favorites. That could make for a really lame show, too. 

OK, I'll make one prediction: The show won't end until midnight. Billy Crystal won't be able to help himself, and from what I've read, he intends this to be kind of a celebration of all the previous Oscars he's hosted. I suppose the show is always self-indulgent, but this sounds even worse. 

The Electric Company: Morgan Freeman's springboard to stardom

While watching the Golden Globes with my dear friend A. Sunday night and enjoying the tribute to Morgan Freeman, we joked that it would be hilarious if during the montage of highlights from his film career, a clip from his days on The Electric Company was also included. 

There's Freeman in Glory! He's Drivin' Miss Daisy! He's educating Brad Pitt on the seven deadly sins in Seven! Suiting up Bruce Wayne with new bat-gear in The Dark Knight! Look how he became Nelson Mandela in Invictus! Shawshank!

What if Freeman as Count Dracula from a PBS show many of us enjoyed when we were kids was included? And then, there it was...

That "Electric Company" clip caused quite the surge on Twitter. (Okay, maybe a few too many people mentioned it.)

It was an awesome moment (probably the best of the night), puncturing the pomposity of the moment and reminding us all that these award shows often take themselves just a bit too seriously. And if that joke couldn't be made on the Golden Globes, where else could it be done?

However, it was also a reminder of the climb that most actors have to make toward success. Freeman obviously established himself long ago. But even he had to start somewhere. (And for many people, that early role is affectionately remembered from childhood.)

Like I'm sure Freeman wouldn't have gotten a role in Christopher Nolan's Batman movies if he didn't already have the experience of working with Spider-Man on his resume.

Why hasn't a remake of 'Brainstorm' been made?

So the Natalie Wood case has been re-opened by the L.A. County sheriff. (I have to wonder how many people reading this will even remember that case. I mostly remember the terrible "What kind of wood doesn't float?" jokes.)

That led to the debacle of an AP reporter thinking that a radio impersonation of Christopher Walken — who co-starred with Wood in her last movie, Brainstorm — was the real thing. (Great work, Nigel!) 

But this got me to thinking, with all the movie remakes we're subjected to these days, why hasn't anyone taken a crack at Brainstorm? Here's the trailer: 

Maybe the premise of Brainstorm has been repeated in movies like Surrogates or even Minority Report (the nightclub where people could plug into fantasy scenarios) enough already.

But it seems like you could put a modern spin on the story, especially with so many people living their lives online now and our increasingly addictive nature as a culture. Plus, you have the corporate and government interference aspects of the story. That stuff is timeless. (Heck, cast Walken as the CEO of the company funding the project.) 

I eagerly await reading the news that a remake is being developed. 

When adolescent power fantasies become sobering nightmares

With Tuesday's off-day in the World Series, I had a chance to catch up on a few things that I hadn't watched. (All caught up on 'Community' and 'Hawaii Five-O.' Not sure why I'm sticking with 'Five-O;' it's been pretty inconsistent this season.)

Although I still sat in front of the computer longer than I planned. Just can't get away.

That gave me the opportunity to watch this 'E:60' report on former pro wrestler Scott Hall, however. It's  'The Wrestler' come to life, though I think Hall has taken a much deeper fall than Mickey Rourke's Randy "The Ram" Robinson. Just watch 1:45 into this clip, and you see something truly sad — a man whose past glories and excesses have burned him out.

It's a sad story from virtually every angle. And I know we've seen plenty of examples of elite athletes who deteriorated once the competition, camaraderie and big paydays was no longer part of their lives.

But this one struck me a bit harder, probably because I was such a big pro wrestling fan when I was a kid. It was probably a natural extension of loving comic books as a kid. These were adolescent power fantasies — with battles between good guys and bad guys — come to life.

I remember Scott Hall wrestling in the smaller American Wrestling Association, back when it was shown on ESPN in the late '80s. But by the time Hall embraced the campy soap opera/show business elements of the industry, becoming the bad guy "Razor Ramon," I had stopped watching. As I had with comic books (though to a lesser extent), I'd outgrown pro wrestling.

Watching Hall adopt a greasy, swarthy Latin look and accent — becoming a racist caricature — was just what was done to become exceedingly popular, the villain everyone loved to hate. Just being a big, strong dude who could lift guys over his head and slam them to the mat wasn't enough. Even as a kid, I think I realized that, as several of my favorite wrestlers became outlandish characters.

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Obviously, that lifestyle caught up with Hall — and I'm sure with dozens of his peers — reducing him to a dried-out husk of his former self. People weren't meant to be superheroically big and pound on each other in cities throughout the country night after night. But when fame and adulation keep coming your way, you want to keep it going.

Why else would you try to wrestle at the age of 52, when your body can barely move and you're so hopped up on medications that you're barely aware what's going on around you? That footage of Hall trying to stage a wrestling match while experiencing what turned out to be a drug overdose was an embarrassment for everyone involved. (And I hope the promoter who insisted on carrying out the charade is no longer in business.) It's hard to watch.

And for a guy who used to love this stuff when he was a kid, it's pretty sobering.

What might be saddest of all in Hall's story is that it looks like his son might be doomed to repeat the mistakes his father made. He wants to become a pro wrestler too. And ol' Dad seems more interested in rekindling past glories than steering his son away from the things that caused his downfall.

I think I was better off sticking with the comic books.

(via SB Nation)

Nostalgia for arms getting chomped off

As feared, posts have been scarce here as the baseball postseason plays out.

With the World Series tied at 1-1, we'll be covering the Rangers and Cardinals for at least another week. And that will be fun. Who doesn't want a close, competitive series? But after a month of late nights, I think most people who cover baseball — reporter, columnist, and blogger — are about ready for a break. 

I also haven't been able to see any movies lately, which is kind of a bummer. For instance, I think I completely missed "Drive," which is one I really wanted to see. I haven't even seen "Moneyball" yet, which is baffling.

I noticed that a remake of "The Thing" is currently in theaters, however. Not great reviews, but Mary Elizabeth Winstead sure is cute. Anyway, John Carpenter's version from 1982 has always been one of my favorites. Can this new one possibly be up to par?

All I want to know is, does the new version have a scene like this?

(This is most definitely Not Safe For Work.)

My arms! My arms! As my friend A. points out, gory chest scenes were all the rage in the late '70s, early '80s between this scene and John Hurt's breakout in "Alien."

The head turning into an insect-like thing with six legs was pretty freaky, too. Even if those effects don't quite hold up 29 (!) years later. 

But has Kurt Russell ever looked more bad-ass than with a flamethrower? 

A. informs me that Carpenter's version is currently streaming on Netflix, if you're interested. And how could you not be after watching that? 

Random thoughts on R.E.M.

Could you navigate the internet on Wednesday without encountering a story about R.E.M. "calling it a day" as a band? Virtually every site I like to frequent wrote some sort of eulogy or tribute today, trying to capture in a few hundred words just how important the band was.

As is usually the case, I don't think such things can be conveyed through words. You had to live through it. You had to listen when R.E.M. was played on the radio, you had to listen to their albums, you had to feel those songs, you had to watch them interact with the culture at large.

That's not to say anyone can't appreciate R.E.M. by listening to their music. Obviously, that's their legacy.

No other band sounded like R.E.M. (I've seen the word "jangly" thrown around a lot.) You could recognize one of their songs within the first couple of notes, even before Michael Stipe began singing. Crafting such a distinct sound is not something that many bands can accomplish. I don't think there can be a better testament to their greatness.

Rather than try and sum up how important R.E.M. has been to me and the people in my life, I figured I'd just post the various random thoughts that have swirled around my head in the hours since the announcement was made.

• After the news broke, I spent hours trying to determine what my favorite R.E.M. song is. There shouldn't be any thought to it, right? It's whatever comes into your head first. Not that simple with R.E.M. It's not just that they composed so many great songs. But certain songs get associated with moments or feelings.

Would I call "Everybody Hurts" my favorite? No, but it's a song I love driving to. And yes, I put it on when I'm feeling down, as cliched as that might be.

"Nightswimming" got me through so many late-night writing efforts in school. It just shut out all the surrounding noise and helped me focus. Actually, maybe the whole "Automatic For the People" album had that effect on me.

But gun to the head, choose one song, I think I'd go with "Finest Worksong."

I'm sure I'll want to edit this and choose another song as soon as I click publish.

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• However, I love "What's the Frequency, Kenneth?" It doesn't sound like a R.E.M. song, but felt like Peter Buck said, "Enough of these fuckin' mandolins — let's rock." Any time a band wants to break out the loud guitars, I'm usually sucked in.

I've always gotten the impression that "Monster" was one of R.E.M.'s least popular albums among longtime fans because it was so different, but not for me. It's just a good rock record. "Crush With Eyeliner," "Bang and Blame," and "Strange Currencies" are each among my favorite songs.

• During my freshman year of college, we spent way too much time trying to get "It's the End of the World As We Know It" on our answering machine. To this day, when I hear the words "feelin' pretty psyched," I think it's our cue to hit the record button.

• Is "Me in Honey" an underrated R.E.M. song? I feel like it is. One of my favorites. Love the guitar.

• I only saw R.E.M. once in concert. It was during the "Monster" tour. My sister and I couldn't get seats together, and sat on different sides of The Palace of Auburn Hills. I was in the absolute last row of my section and could lean back against the wall of the upper deck.

(Here's the setlist for the show, thanks to a website I didn't know existed until today. I will surely be wasting many afternoons to come, looking up old concerts I went to.)

I struck up a conversation with a couple who had seen the band six times, all around the country. Listening to their stories, I didn't envy them seeing R.E.M. so often as much as I wished I'd seen them perform in a far smaller venue. A different tour ("Document"? "Out of Time"?) might have been cool too, though I've already expressed my love for "Monster."

• It kind of breaks my heart to say this, but it's also stating the obvious: R.E.M. was never the same band once Bill Berry left. None of the five albums the band released since his exit was that memorable. ("Around the Sun" may have been the most promising.) I can't name one song from those records off the top of my head.

As much as I love R.E.M., I just couldn't get excited about their last two albums. (Being let down by bands and musicians I loved in recent years has contributed to my apathy toward new music these days.) In fact, I don't think I even purchased their latest, "Collapse Into Now." I probably will now. And I'll give those previous four records another chance.

• How many bands would've tried to milk this for a farewell tour? Maybe fewer than I think. But with so many groups reuniting for the money while cashing in on nostalgia, I think it's pretty notable that R.E.M. chose to go out with a quiet bow. (Although Buck and Mike Mills were both outspoken about not enjoying the grind of a long tour.)

Would I have liked to see a farewell tour? Yeah, probably. It would've been nice to say goodbye and hear some of those songs live one more time.

Should we make any guesses as to when we'll see a reunion tour? Or when those rumors will begin?

Ready to swoon over Goon

Loving hockey for the fighting isn't really cool anymore. (Especially with the sport's concern over concussions and so many enforcers, such as the late former Detroit Red Wing Bob Probert, suffering from degenerative brain disease.)

Hockey really is a beautiful game with the skating and puck handling. But it's still so much fun to see two guys throw down the gloves and mix it up.

Maybe I'll have to settle for seeing it at the movies instead, with the succinctly titled Goon.

What looks most glorious of all is Liev Schreiber's mullet and mustache. Way better than the mutton chops he sported in the awful X-Men Origins: Wolverine.

OK, that's probably not going to be a great one. But hopefully, it's fun. (And if not, Kevin Smith's Hit Somebody will be coming out at some point, too.)

Watching the two goons throw off the gloves and stare each other down reminds me of some of the great hockey fights we saw in Detroit. Bob Probert versus Troy Crowder comes to mind.

(Probie had so many good fights, really. Marty McSorley. Tie Domi. Stu Grimson. I'm sure I'm forgetting several others.)

The immediate impulse is to compare Goon to Slap Shot. Here's where I make a movie confession: I have never seen Slap Shot. Yes, I call myself a sports fan.

(Hat tip to Dave Shand on Facebook)

This was not Journey's finest moment

Just to prove (if only to myself) that I can be objective about Journey (in light of my last post), I will now make fun of them for quite possibly one of the silliest music videos ever made.

The year was 1983, the song was "Separate Ways." 

It was another big hit for Journey, despite a video in which the band is often depicted playing invisible instruments.

How did the discussion with the director go for this one?

Director: So what I'm thinking is we shoot some scenes with you guys playing invisible instruments.

Journey: What?

Director: Yeah, it'll be cool. Because this is a song about a, uh, failed relationship, right? I read the lyrics. So your instruments are like that girl that's gone now.

Journey: So we're just pretending to play guitars, drums and keyboards?

Director: Oh, and you'll be stalking some chick in heels and a leather skirt with massive hair. All takes place on a wharf.

Journey. [...]

Director: Trust me. This will rock. You don't see Foreigner doing this shit.

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Jonathan Cain was even asked to play a keyboard mounted on a wall. Who would ever play that way? (Of course, that still isn't as dumb as a Keytar.)

Another classic moment is when Steve Perry is walking backwards between stacks of pallets, looking behind himself to make sure he doesn't run into or fall over something. (Look anguished, Steve! The pallets are the obstacles in love!)

They had to have filmed this thing on a Sunday when no workers were around on the wharf. Not only would there have been major laughter, but you would've had pantomiming musicians getting in the way of actual blue-collar work being done. ("Hey Elvis, you gonna be done soon? We gotta forklift those pallets.")

Okay, enough snark and screen caps. Here's the video: